My longstanding stance on video games has been that they are piles of crap. I even felt this way after the advent of Coolboarders and the rest of the “extreme sports” video games¿they only make me feel more mediocre when I go out and try to do the actual sports.

Pinball, however, is a game I’ve always loved. I like it because of the old-school technology¿you have to operate levers with actual springs and cogs. The best thing about pinball is the “tilt” mechanism, which immediately ends the game if the machine is manhandled too much. This allows you the unique opportunity to clear the scoreboard when your opponent is slaughtering you, all under the guise of playing an “empassioned” pinball game. You lose your quarters, of course, but you save your pride.¿J.S.

If you were a video game character, what would your secret move be?

Travis Parker
Age: 24
Sponsors: K2, Sessions, DC, Smith, MiloSport, GMC “The chicken dance.”

Josh Dirksen
Age: 24
Sponsors: DC, Version, Dub, Exit Real World, Da Kine “I’d be able to frontside boardslide on anything.”

Jason “J2” Rasmus
Age: Close to the ol’ 30 bastard
Sponsors: Gnu, Rip Curl, Technine, Northwave, Anon, One Ball Jay, Kingpin Productions

“Getting free drinks at the bar, then knowing what the secret password is to say to the ladies.”

Lukas Huffman
Age: 22
Sponsors: Nitro, Northwave, 55DSL, Drake, Dragon, Bakoda

“My secret move is pretty easy to do. I do it every day, and I think with a little practice anybody can do it. Let me walk you through it:

“The first step involves opening your mind and your eyes. Step number two is the easiest and most important phase. I get up off the couch and move away from the TV/video-game brainwashing station. After this, I usually head in the direction of ‘outside my house.’ Now use your open eyes and mind. Absorb. Find your own f¿king secret move.”