X Games 11: Bright Wins Halfpipe

All right, so tonight were the Women’s Halfpipe Finals at Winter X Games 11, and because you’re all probably just going to talk about pants anyway, we’re going to beat you to the punch. The pipe was extremely long, and each girl and her pants had two runs that were separately scored, with the highest one being counted. So, it was pretty standard—uh, we mean, extreme. The scene at the bottom of the pipe was basically a circus with food tents, people from Mountain Dew talking loudly on megaphones, and a crowd of extremely excited spectators—all of whom were wearing pants. Luckily for the excited spectators’ pants, the scene in the pipe was equally circus-like, what with flips and spins and whatnot going down all night.

Anyway, Kjersti Buaas’ pants were pretty average—somewhere between Magoon and Robbie Sell—and a fairly neutral color, so no controversy sparking there, although she did pull out one of the first solid runs of the night, and who’s to say that her pants weren’t helping her out with that. Elena Hight’s yellow pants killed it with some extremely extreme amplitude, a solid nine, and a frontside seven Japan that landed her in third place. Molly Aguirre’s zany striped pants had potential but couldn’t put together a solid run. However, she did get to hang out at the bottom of the halfpipe with Kevin Costner’s pants, which were possibly the same ones he wore in that one movie with the baseball players. Okay, now back to snowboarding—Gretchen Bleiler parted with her usual girlish print pants and opted for some plain black ones that the crowd was completely in love with since she put on said pants at her home in Aspen, which is where the X Games are held. So with home court advantage, Gretchen and her pants threw down a great second run complete with a 900, a backside Crippler, and back-to-back fives. Unfortunately for Gretchen’s many fans, Torah Bright’s pants were brown, which was a good choice because her huge first airs, back-to-back threes, McTwist, and switch backside five were all dirty, dirty, dirty and put her in first place, with Gretchen coming in a close second.

Well, I guess that about covers it. Stay tuned for more extreme coverage of the X Games this weekend right here on twsnow.com, because while none of us can agree on what kind of pants people should wear, I think we can all safely say that the internet is about a million times better than television.

Final Results:

1. Torah Bright—94.66
2. Gretchen Bleiler—91.00
3. Elena Hight—88.00

4. Hannah Teter—85.33
5. Kjersti Oestgaard Buaas—73.00
6. Mercedes Nicoll—67.00
7. Manuela Pesko—66.00
8. Molly Aguirre—65.00
9. Sophie Rodriguez—60.66
10. Kelly Clark—45.66