Everyone around here is constantly getting free stuff, except for us. The tone-deaf managing editor’s got stacks of CDs on her desk, and that fat-ass senior editor has so many pairs of shoes stashed under his desk, it’s obscene. So it was about f-king time we got something in this cubicle. Unfortunately, it was CoolBoarders 2001.
We were told by The Man to stoke out Sony with a good review, which we would have if they’d sent us a PlayStation 2. But they didn’t, so we’re going to tell it like it is. This game is pretty lame-what kind of a dumb-ass would snowboard in shorts? Sure, all logos and sponsors are updated, and all our favorite snowboarders are in there, too. But after five versions, you would’ve hoped they’d at least updated the operating system.
Since we obviously don’t want this game, and don’t want to be as lame as the rest of the people in this building by trading it in for cash, we’re going to give it away to the first person who sends in the correct name of the rider pictured on the game’s CD. Send entries to “Why Can’t There Be A Snowboarding Video Game That’s As Fresh As Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 2?” 353 Airport Road, Oceanside, California 92054.