Foward: Wille Yli-Luoma

What country am I calling?
Switzerland.

How’s your injury? Are you all better?
Yeah, except my teeth¿they fell out a couple weeks ago again. They came out, but I can keep them in. They’re just loose.

Are these fake teeth or real teeth we’re talking about?
They’re just temporary fake teeth.

How did you lose your teeth and hurt your knee?
I went off this cliff a little too fast and cleared the landing. I thought the snow was powder, but it was super wind-packed. I landed about 90 degrees short of a 540 and put my teeth into my knee.

You broke them off?
I hit the snow and the next thing I know I’m standing up and taste all this blood. I couldn’t feel my teeth with my tongue¿they’re gone, and there’re pieces of teeth in my mouth everywhere. A piece of my lip had almost fallen off. I was just like, “Great, this is just where it begins. I’m going to have to go through another three hours to get this all fixed.” Then I went down the hill and my knee started hurting, I pulled up my pants and my knee was all bloody¿I’d bit through my pants and long johns and into my knee and blown it out.

Why’d you leave the Forum eight to ride for a big corporate ski company?
There were lots of reasons. All the riders on Forum are so good¿it was almost hard to get what you deserve when you have eight riders that good. The fact that K2 offered me a three-year contract was really important. I knew I was about to become a dad, and I wanted to make sure I could support my kid. Plus, I just get along so good with the K2 riders. I’m not saying I didn’t get along with the guys on Forum, but the team I’m on now has the funnest guys ever. I don’t have anything bad to say about Forum¿they helped me out, too.

Is your wife Nicole Angelrath … umm¿you guys are married?
Almost¿we have a kid.

So you’re not technically married yet, you’ve just got the kid … Lulu.
Lilou.

Lilou, sorry. How old is she now?
Nine-and-a-half months mid-June.

So now that you have a child, are you all business on the slopes?
No.

It doesn’t change your attitude toward your career?
I don’t go, “Let’s get this done, I need to get some money so I can feed my little girl. She needs diapers.”

Eddie Lee from ThirtyTwo is claiming all these stories he has of you …
He can’t write anything about me! Eddie, he’s banned. I don’t even know who that guy is anymore, and he better not be in the story! Both laugh.

He’s writing some stuff¿poop, Mace, et cetera.
I wouldn’t use it, I know what’s going to be there¿oh man, my parents don’t need to read this!

I’ll write a little “Sorry, Dad” for you.
No, don’t¿hell no.

It’ll read: Dear Wille’s dad, I’m sorry I had to write all this in here, but I had to stay true to my journalistic integrity and keep it real. Laughs.
How about this: this is TransWorld, and it’s for kids. This is no Big Brother¿you can’t blackmail people. This is no BLUNT.

It is now that I’m here, baby laughs. Is Nicole yelling at me in another language?
Yeah laughs.

When was the last time you swilled Drano?
Oh man. You guys can’t put that in here.

Sure I can. I’m just asking a simple question.
No, I never drank Drano¿but Pine-Sol¿as a matter of fact, I remember drinking, about a year-and-a-half ago.

You mistook a bottle of Pine-Sol for something good?
Yeah, I thought I was going to the hospital for poisoning …

What did you do?
I spit it all out and tried to wash my mouth. It felt like someone put gasoline in my mouth and burned it. I couldn’t feel my tongue or anything in my mouth. I washed my mouth with milk about 200 times.

How did this come about?
I woke up and was thirsty. I guess I walked into the laundry room innstead of the kitchen.

That’s good enough for me. I recorded this, so I’m gonna transcribe it today.
You recorded this phone conversation? Laughs You can’t do that.

Don’t worry about it, dude. It’s TransWorld, we’re a clean magazine. We can’t say anything that bad.
Yeah you can, I’m sure you’ll find a way around it. I’m sure you already did laughs.

Nah, I haven’t been here that long.
You guys can’t say “drinking alcohol,” right?

No.
So I bet you say, “He drinks a lot of sodas on his days off,” stuff like that.

I might say, “Wille really hits the road soda on Friday night.”
No, no¿you’re a bastard laughs. Can you mention that I really like everyone at K2? I mean, besides the riders¿the internal people?

Nope.